The Journey

It's been a long time since I have blogged....but now the time has come and I am excited to share some of my life, thoughts, and "finds"again with all of you. The last 18 months have been a bit of a struggle personally. Being diagnosed with a recurrence of breast cancer really came out of left field and rocked my world...big time. But, as in all things, along with the bad...there is always some good. This period of time has made me reevaluate some things in my life and look a little deeper into who I am and who I have become. I have come to realize that I am not the same woman that I was in February 2004, when I was first diagnosed with BC....I took the fight personally....it was ON....and I had no doubts that I would win. But once the chemo was done, the radiation completed, my hair and body began to return to it's old norm.....I was left feeling not quite right in my own skin.

So I dove into new endeavors.....was so busy working full-time and running a second business that, now when I look back on it....I didn't have time to look a little deeper into myself. But in the meantime this was working for me.....and I think, for me anyway....it took time to be ready. Absolutely I don't regret doing any of the things I did during this time, the great people I met, or any experiences that I had.

But when a case of pneumonia, due to a doctor who was very vigilant and I will never forget, turned into a recurrence of the dreaded Big C, which all coincided with the decision to close my secondary business....did I begin to take the time to look a bit deeper at myself and do some research into how cancer affects you after your have waged the war.

How could this have happened?? All my test were good, no signs - low tumor markers, nothing in the initial tests, I went religiously for my check ups....so this definitely was a shock to say the least. Now don't get me wrong, I certainly thought "Why me?" But as I laid in the hospital.....I quickly began to think "Why NOT me?" What made me different from all the thousands of people who had the same hopes and dreams of being cancer free and "cured" for the rest of their lives. A very good team of doctor's, who I have put my life in their hands, have reassured me the cancer has not spread and with proper medication I should still live a long life....but it is unsettling none the less. So I began my "Journey" to look a little deeper, found some great websites, blogs, fb pages that all were about women and men like me who were finding that they were not the same person that they had been when this battle began.....Wow, I was "normal" after all.....or as "normal" as Maitecha can be. The pieces of the puzzle started to come together...and although it is far from finished...with the help of God, my fabulous friends and family...it's coming together nicely these days.

I have a very good friend who does a fabulous job with her blog and tried to encourage me to blog again...but I just didn't have it in my....well the time has come.....more to follow......